The Borg Approacheth
Viking Biochemist writes:
Our lab meeting was invaded this morning by corporate zombies who wanted to show us our “new brand”. Our logo looks like a computer power switch but is supposed to be “a cheeky reminder of a copyright logo” which we then stick over every image in our ads.
Apparently we now own babies, butterflies, eggs, tablets and bees.
This is all so when our granny asks where we work, we don’t have to say
“It’s like the Garvan”, because of course that’s what we all did.… and this is the place I will have on my CV for the rest of my life as
where I did my PhD. Maybe I should add a note:
I started at the Centenary before they turned evilFortunately, there is a good trashy action movie out today, so I can go
and sooth my soul with a giant mechatronic man smashing stuff for two hours.
This reminds me of a strange email that went to everyone on the University HR list a few days ago, the understanding of which yet eludes me:
In 2002 the University determined that dissemination of all text-based, third-party copyright materials required for student course work would be carried out by the Library. However, a decentralised approach was adopted in the case of images, diagrams and artistic works included in lecture presentations and lecture notes. It was agreed that these could be located on individual course web sites and on learning management systems.
The University is party to a new agreement with the Copyright Agency Limited (CAL) which places greater emphasis on the monitoring process and in the future details of all images, diagrams and artistic works communicated to students under Part VB of the Copyright Act will have to be recorded during any monitoring of electronic copying and communication exercise.
It continues in that vein ad nauseam. And I am thoroughly sick of corporatization, wank, and arsepaperwork.
May 1st, 2008 at 15:47
There’s more.
You should also have a look at our new website. It’s horrendous.
http://www.centenary.org.au
We’ve hired a top marketing agency to redo our brand, and have ended up with a black and white photo of a baby and the computer on/off switch.
Apparently the baby symbolises, among other things, that we’re “new kids on the block – we haven’t been around for 100 years like WEHI so we can have a fresh, dynamic, innovative ideas!”.
The baby is also “very different to what other brands in our sector are doing”, which I suppose is right, as we’re the only institute I can think of whose logo doesn’t involve some sort of swooping helix. However, I get the impression their swooping helices were drawn up by their director’s secretary, not commissioned for ridiculous sums from “the company behind marketing for Bluescope Steel and Kevin07!”
Oh, and we’re all supposed to be “brand ambassadors”. Am I doing it right?
May 1st, 2008 at 15:52
Apparently the baby symbolises
that there’s crap all over the floor? You’re not potty-trained?
My word. That website is truly horrendous. The font, the pastels, the OH GOD MY POOR EYES!
May 1st, 2008 at 15:58
But but but…
The green is “fresh” and “new”! I have it on good authority!
The bit that really really gets me is the creepy pseudo-copyright sign on everthing. A sign of things to come….
May 1st, 2008 at 16:04
Actually, I do need to point out that it wasn’t as bad as we’d feared. When we were first told that the zombies would be invading, we guessed that it was to implant us with some sort of bug/tracking device to make sure we never talked about Centenary IP with anyone anauthorised or tried to get jobs elsewhere.
May 1st, 2008 at 16:06
How do you know that they didn’t?