In the post-Christmas languor
\n Approaching the New Year\u2014
\nHeart and belly sated
\n Full with seasonal cheer\u2014
\nWhile bagging up the gift-wrap,
\n Under a pile of mail
\nI glimpsed a red-trimmed postcard:
\n Orvis having a sale.<\/p>\n
Under the pizza leaflets,
\n Envelopes for the poor,
\nLocal IT repair firms\u2014
\n All offered through my door;
\nProclaimed the Orvis postcard
\n (I\u2019m sure it said, I swore!),
\nFor sale: hundreds of poems,
\n All \u201cat half-price or more.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat are these wondrous tidings?\u201d
\n I said, and in my haste,
\nPulled on my boots and raincoat,
\n \u201cThere is no time to waste!
\nI\u2019ll go straight to Dover Street
\n To find this sacred store,
\nThere to buy us some poems
\n All for half-price or more.\u201d<\/p>\n
In my granddad’s day, he got
\n A sonnet for his daughter.
\nEven then they were not cheap\u2014
\n Sixpence for a quarter.
\nBut he would be shocked to see
\n At the Orvis store,
\nPoems of all size and shapes
\n For sale; half-price or more.<\/p>\n
In my mind I saw it clear:
\n New poems by the pound!
\nFinely graded, freshly picked,
\n In spoonfuls heaped and round.
\nOr, perhaps, they\u2019d sell by length,
\n Laid out across the floor:
\nI\u2019d get three yards of sonnet
\n And pay half-price or more.<\/p>\n
I\u2019d try all their limericks As I reached to take the card, Dashed was my Christmas vision\u2014 <\/p>\n Bah humbug.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In the post-Christmas languor Approaching the New Year\u2014 Heart and belly sated Full with seasonal cheer\u2014 While bagging up the gift-wrap, Under a pile of mail I glimpsed a red-trimmed postcard: Orvis having a sale. Under the pizza leaflets, Envelopes for the poor, Local IT repair firms\u2014 All offered through my door; Proclaimed the Orvis […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67],"tags":[83,84],"class_list":["post-332","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poems","tag-christmas","tag-poem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/332","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=332"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/332\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=332"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=332"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rg-d.com\/BioLOG\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=332"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n And even haikus too\u2014
\nAnd to the fair assistant,
\n I\u2019d say, \u201cAnd one for you?\u201d
\nI\u2019d hurry then, and take the card
\n (\u2018Cause it would be a mess
\nIf what they really meant to say
\n Wasn\u2019t \u201chalf-price or less<\/em>\u201d).<\/p>\n
\n My hand upon the door,
\nA pizza leaflet shifted;
\n I saw the line once more:
\nAn \u2018i\u2019 and \u2018t\u2019 were covered\u2014
\n Not \u2018poems\u2019 at the store\u2014
\nIt read \u201cHundreds of items<\/em>
\n All at half-price or more.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n There was no sacred store
\nWith yards and heaps of sonnets
\n And verses on the floor.
\nCurse your eight-pointed snowflakes!
\n (Your grammar\u2019s also poor.)
\nYet still I\u2019ll dream of poems
\n Hundreds: half-price, or more.<\/p>\n