Gems from uk.comp.sys.mac




Elana Kehoe

Re: We haven't got one of these yet...

Thu, 14 Mar 2002 20:30:09 GMT

PeterD wrote:

> Elana Kehoe wrote:
> > 48!  Wait, is that good? Shoot, subtract.  Okay...42?  Whoo hoo!  I am
> > the answer to life, the universe and everything!  Hey, Schmoo, whaddya
> > think of that? :-)
> erm, isn't 100 minus 48... FIFTY-two? Perhaps you're the answer to lice,
> the uniform and Emily Ching?

Damn, was hoping no one would notice that.  I am complete crap at math.
From now on it's Apple Menu -> Calculator. :-)  And I would prefer to be
the answer to rice, the uninformed and my thing.


Drag and dock.


Thu, 14 Mar 2002 21:55:26 +0000

Richard P. Grant  wrote:

> In article <>,
>  swroo wrote:

> It's called spring-loaded fodlers, 

You made a typo. It's actually "sprnig-lodded fodlers" 

D.M. Procida

Re: Faster under Mac OS X?


Mon, 18 Mar 2002 11:37:05 GMT

Woody  wrote:

> > An operating system which doesn't respond instantly to the user is like
> > a car which doesn't respond instantly to the driver - it is extremely
> > dangerous and could cause carnage on the roads.
> that is just so much bollocks!

You are right, of course. An operating system which doesn't respond
instantly to the user could not, in truth, kill people on the roads. I
was guilty of gross exaggeration when I wrote that and you were quite
right to point it out, not to mention extremely perceptive to note it in
the first place. I sincerely hope that I have not mislead anyone into
believing that an unresponsive Mac OS could be responsible for road
disasters, but thanks to your timely intervention I believe that such an
eventuality has been averted.


Re: SpamSpamSpamandevenmoreSpam


Wed, 03 Apr 2002 21:05:26 BST

Richard P. Grant  wrote:

> In article <>,
>  Adrian Tuddenham wrote:
> > How many responses does a spammer need to stay in business? 
> How many spammers does it take to change a lightbulb?


I got an email just like this, and like you probly are, I thought "Yeah,
right, no-one can change 20,000 lightbulbs in a week". But something
made me read on.... And I thought, well, what's to lose? I followed the
instructions below and changed 3,000 LIGHTBULBS IN MY FIRST WEEK!!!
After that, things just got BETTER and BETTER - within JUST ONE MONTH I
was changing 10,000 LIGHTBULBS A WEEK, and I now regularly change

Gordon McCallum

Re: X: Stability? My arse.......

11 Apr 2002 21:07:47 GMT

<<  I suspect that's bollocks, but I can't prove it and I'm being rude. 
(sorry!).  Thing is, I just don't buy the stories about OS X stability.   >>

Don't be sorry. I am a lawyer. I am used to it.

Richard P. Grant

Re: CD - Copy Protection

Fri, 17 May 2002 09:36:58 +0100

In article <Xns9210B7E19CDC9rexxdeansaund@>,
  Rexx Magnus wrote:

>  This time it rebooted into X after doing a restart, withouth holding the
>  key. I hadn't set it to boot back into 9 though.
>  I'm going to try holding the 9 key later on, just out of curiosity.

'He was never seen again'

Peter Ceresole

Re: Very OT but very nice.


Fri, 02 May 2003 14:26:25 +0100

In article <>,
"Richard P. Grant" < wrote:

>> Where is the definitive hard copy stored? Last I heard it was at the Deal
>> archive with the permanent rules of Mornington Crescent.
>Now *there's* an interesting place to visit.  Say 'hi' to the head 
>Porter - George - from me if you go there.  Nice chap - worth getting to 
>know him, he knows all the tricks that the librarians don't.

My main contact was some years ago with the archivist, Mr Arbuthnot. I was
researching the historic rule changes that took place in Mornington
Crescent in the '30s and '40s, following the decision to incorporate
methods of accomodating foreign systems after the adoption of Mornington
Crescent as part of the world Chess championships. Speelman's doubling of
Korchnoi on the Sebastopol spur caused huge excitement and made it clear
that the Long Spur rule, which had been introduced in the '30s to
accomodate the Central Line, would have to be modified in the light of the
surface crossing of the Neva by the Sebastopol line. Similarly the
emergency changes of the '40s and '50s, to take account of Berlin war
damage (modelled on the similar changes forced by damage in the Blitz) and
then the splitting of the S-Bahn after the building of the Berlin Wall.
Even more importantly, few people remember that the international league of
Mornington Crescent was maintained throughout the conflict in Sweden and to
a lesser extent in Denmark. It's little known that one of the first actions
of Nils Bohr on arriving in England in '42 was to resume an interrupted
game with George Chadwick at the NPL. Bohr was said to have started a new
game at Los Alamos on his arrival there; the details have always been
shrouded in mystery, but it was believed to have been the very first game
to have used the New York subway. However, Bohr was notoriously
uncommunicative on the subject and the New York rules filed at Deal are a
*later* set. In fact part of my long discussions in Deal were attempting to
locate the orignal Bohr rules (a great prize for whoever rediscovers them)
and to nail the truth or otherwise that Rudolph Hess's mysterious flight to
England had in fact been motivated by the fact that he had discovered that
Hitler and Churchill had once played a postal game of Mornington Crescent,
which was at the origin of Hitler's famous anglophilia. Hess believed that
he could revive the amity of the two men- he was of course deluded. The
programme I was researching was to have been called "The Epping Double: how
Hitler lost the war and the Allies won on the Central Line". But although I
found tantalising hints, the archives were ultimately silent on this
crucial moment in our Great Game...


Bruce Horrocks

Re: Macs in white hats (again)

Wed, 25 Jun 2003 00:14:35 BST

In message <>, Peter 
Ashby  writes
>Who is seriously irritated by this storm in a teacup story.

I can sense a Private Eye editorial coming on:

"For years, this newspaper along with all others, has consistently 
harangued the Royal Family for being outdated, stupid and irrelevant 
parasites that have no place in a modern democracy under President 
Blair, as indicated by headlines such as "Royal Estate found on Moon" 
and "Prince Charles spends 15 minutes talking to rose named after him."

"We wish to apologise unreservedly for any misunderstanding these 
stories might have caused. We now realise that a lone intruder at 
Windsor Castle, had he been an Al Qaeda suicide bomber, could have 
wiped-out the entire Royal Family in one fell swoop, throwing the 
country into a disarray not seen since the Dark Ages and causing the 
crown to pass to Mrs. Doris Glamis-Grimaldi, the Queen's 27th cousin, 
16th removed, currently resident in a Palm Beach home for the retired."

"Our advertisers wish to thank-you Ma'am and long may you continue to 
fill our pages with stories. [Surely "reign over us?" Ed.]"


Peter Ashby

Re: Amazon spam

Wed, 25 Jun 2003 12:20:43 +0100

In article <>,
 "Richard P. Grant"  wrote:

> > Ditto: curiosity: Bingo! You got one right. Tell me if a  scientist is 
> > not to be motivated by curiosity what should we be motivated by instead? 
> He says it as if it's a bad thing.
> My main motivations?  I like to find out how things work and the 'wow, 
> look at *that*' factor.  

People go off and walk to the north pole while wearing a diving suit 
because noone has done that variation before when they could do science 
and see things noone has ever seen before, discover things noone knew 
existed, understand things noone understood before. True epiphanies in 
science are rare but when they happen, wow! as you say. I had one a 
couple of years ago in Geneva, I had come up with a hypothesis during my 
PhD and ten years later I was looking at something which confirmed my 
hypothesis. I wasn't the first to look, but i was the first to look in 
the right place, for the right reasons. Then I found something which 
meant I had an experiment fall into my lap that I thought I couldn't 
easily do. The results of all that have just been submitted for 
publication but I can still remember the feeling of sitting on that 
stool looking down that scope. Doing it for money? money couldn't buy 
that high.


Adrian Tuddenham

Re: [OT] ID cards

Wed, 28 Apr 2004 22:30:20 +0100

PeterD  wrote:

> Perhaps it's to stop Al Qaeiouda hijacking dogs on string and releasing
> them in Westminster.


X Kyle M Thompson

Re: Photoshop and the Dock


Tue, 04 May 2004 14:43:52 +0100

Bella Jones wrote:
> There are hailstones the size of peas coming down outside. Put my hand
> out the window and 'Ow.'

Try opening it first.


Chris Ridd

Re: Gwyneth Paltrow's Apple

Sun, 16 May 2004 15:10:15 +0100

On 16/5/04 2:33 pm, in article, "Andrew
Stephenson" wrote:

> In article <>
>   "PeterD" writes:
>> Chris Ridd wrote:
>>> On 16/5/04 1:03 pm, in article
>>>, "Tim Gowen"
>>> wrote:
>>>> She has named her new daughter Apple...
>>>> Eh?
>>> Well, why not. Maybe she'll get free Macs for life or something.
>> No, she's being sued by Apple Corps.
> Only if the baby makes noises -- or was it just music?

That apparently never stopped Yoko Ono :-(




Re: OT: (very) Free to collector, a cooker!

22 May 2004 12:35:21 GMT

Flavio Matani wrote:

> > If they're not cokoing on gas then 'electric' is prolly the word you're
> > lokoing for.
> why can't they be cokoing on an eclectic prolly?

I don't think you can. You can have a cokoier on gas, but eclectic
prollies are too small for a chief koier and cokoier on the same hob.


Re: Critical OS X security flaw


Fri, 21 May 2004 16:08:15 +0100

In article <>, Bonge Boo! wrote:

> Can you ping flood yourself?

   $ sudo ping -f localhost

Can't see much point in "DOSsing myself off" though - S&M hacking maybe?



Re: Kill Television


Wed, 20 Oct 2004 15:06:16 +0000 (UTC)

In article <slrncncubd.218j.jim@odin.magrathea.local>,
 Jim wrote:

> In article <cl5ti8$k2f$3$>, Martin wrote:
> > In article <41767080$0$20957$>,
> >  "David Glover"  wrote:
> >
> >> "Martin"  wrote in message
> >> news:cl5p3q$gav$1$
> >> > I'd always fancied one of these myself:
> >>
> >> A technological solution to a social problem. If people are incapable of
> >> using a mobile phone discreetly, I find actually complaining to them works
> >> well.
> >>
> >> No need to punish everyone in the area.
> >
> > I used to share office space with a bloke who loved making us suffer
> > Crapital Radio all day. It was when Whitney Houston had that really
> > fucking annoying and whiney number one hit.
> No, you're going to have to narrow it down a wee bit more than that.


You know the one?

Thom White

Re: OT: Downloading ethics

Wed, 20 Oct 2004 13:52:03 +0100

Giles Paterson wrote:

> Remember kids; home taping is killing music.

How about if we just taped the rubbish stuff - could we get rid of
specific artists?